Sunday, March 15, 2009 played with fire at
Well now since i'm on hols and all the major plans area still far ahead (not sure if i can even go for half of them --) and so i've been hanging around online and wat not~ it really is dangerous rearranging stuff inside your hard drive. one thing, it screws up your music player if you use the playlist. lol~ i'm sure u know what i mean. but the main thing is when u look back at all those old files and and old shots and u compare to the recent ones...I do see a vast difference in terms of the people in the photos and how I look in them
First, to those that do not know, i have a stupid habit of always looking back and seldom be looking forward, so i tend to miss out on important things most of the time which is why i always seem to drift off and think a lot of what happened a few years back and also worry of what's to happen in the future like who am i still gonna see and who will be disappearing again like we've never met before. I know there's still other ways to converse and keep connected but somehow, somewhere, you do know that things aren't like how they were before which really is a painful.
There was a time when I actually thought that no one besides my family and a close friend would care if i were to disappear or just be erased be left 6 feet under. There was a few that actually objected to that and said things like they would have cared but didn't take their words seriously...am still doubting it tho lol -- (just look at how we are now. you wouldn't even know if i somehow died) and besides, looking back then...yes i was a total screw up but it did save me from being the person i would despise...someone blindly following the trend.
Like the most of you know, college have really saved me from the lonely atmosphere. I've met a lot of people, got to know many knew things and it did changed me somehow. Of course, as you get to know more people, u tend to get closer to a certain group of people and spend more time with the group; in which mine is called Essenism lol =D; and then when you get closer to the group, u tend to have the feeling of wanting to just spend more time with the group, in which i can't...aii == thx to some alternate reasons. yes u know, if I'm staying back to just spend time hanging out, it would just be better if i just come back home and spend time alone in my room...to someone else's logic.
lol some random thing now. I know i wouldn't be typing out the first thing that comes in my mind for some questions if i did it on facebook, so i'll just do it here lol
Don’t think about an answer just put the first thing that pops into your head down.
1. My ex is still: i have none...lol =D
2. I am listening to: Hosana?
3. Maybe I should: go out and hang out more often.
4. I love: left for dead 8D
5. I don’t understand: why i'm so restricted...wait i do
6. I lost: my faith in them
7. People say: a lot of things...frm truths to lies to otright lies == okay wierd
8. The meaning of my screen name is: what i'm really feeling now lol~ so true
9. Love is: a damn scary thing
10. Somewhere, someone is: writing their own story book
11. I will always like: the night life better than the day =D
12. Forever seems: a VERY long time. then again nothing lasts forever anyways
13. I will never ever want to: have a one night stand...o.o""
14. My cellphone is: screwed up and can't wait to get Sid's one =D
15. When I wake up in the morning: i sleep again until my mom calls me or if i can't sleep again =x
16. I get annoyed when: some gay guy starts bugging me like hell or when i just hear their voice
17. Parties are: something i'll never get to experience anytime soon
3/15/2009 07:59:00 PM
